David Spade / Jack Johnson
March 12, 2005

[COLD OPENING] Martha Addresses Employees

Highlights:

· The opening bit with Amy and Rob.

· Spade's approach to playing Martha Stewart was really funny and he had a lot of good lines.

Lowlights:

· Seemed a little rushed towards the end and could've been a little longer.

Grade: B+

[MONOLOGUE] David Spade answers Capital One questions

Highlights:

· Spade treating his Capital One character seriously and explaining his lifestyle.

· Several of the questions were funny.

Lowlights:

· They should've done something funny with the J.B. Smoove/Paula Pell couple, and I didn't like the intentionally-cheesy segue into the 'We got a great show, stick around, etc.' tagline.

Miscellaneous:

· Was the "Best-of DVD" comment serious? I always thought Spade should get a "Best-of", so I hope it's true.

Grade: B

[SKETCH] Bizarre Neighbors Apartment

Highlights:

· Some of the weird furniture/appliances.

· Parnell as the servant coming in wearing a bra with six cups and asking "Who wants milk?".

Lowlights:

· Not as good as the first one from earlier this season.

· Shouldn't have been placed this early in the show.

· They could've done without the "how to pronounce 'Nuni'" bit again. They used that exact same joke last time and it takes up too much time.

Grade: C

[COMMERCIAL] Deaf Judge / Idiot Doctor

Highlights:

· The Idiot Doctor commercial, especially Spade's performance in it.

Lowlights:

· The Deaf Judge commercial with Seth was just stupid.

Grade: C

[NEXT WEEK] March 19, 2005: Ashton Kutcher

· He was actually surprisingly good last time he hosted and I had a feeling SNL would ask him back again sometime.

[SKETCH] David Spade Stunt Double

Highlights:

· Spade saying his double has a camel toe.

· Horatio was hilarious as Vin Diesel.

· A lot of great lines by Spade.

· Spade hitting on his own double at the end.

Lowlights:

· Some of the double scenes during filming.

Miscellaneous:

· Anyone notice Seth always seems to play the director in these types of sketches where a TV show or movie is being filmed?

Grade: B

[COMMERCIAL] Woomba 

· Rerun

[SKETCH] Spider's new cellmate

Highlights:

· Spade helped this sketch a lot and it probably wouldn't have been that funny if it was someone else in the role.

· Rob played a good straight man and it's good to see him in his first really big role in a loooong time.

Lowlights:

· The ending was terrible. They couldn't think of anything better than just having Rob sighing in relief and saying "Thank god that's over with"?

Grade: B

[MUSICAL PERFORMANCE]

[WEEKEND UPDATE] Fey & Poehler, Jorge Rodriguez

Highlights:

· Amy's jeans joke.

· Tina's North Dakota joke.

Lowlights:

· Everything else.

· Where the hell was Spade with the Hollywood Minute? I was really hoping he'd do it tonight and it's probably the thing people remember best about him from his SNL days.  A Hollywood Minute would've helped tonight's Update A LOT.  Instead, we just got a reprisal of Horatio's dumb Jorge Rodriguez character that was a complete carbon copy of his appearance from last season.

Grade: D

[SKETCH] Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast

Highlights:

· A good parody on Penn's infamous appearance at the Oscars.

· Most of the impressions were hilarious, especially Spade as Owen Wilson.

· A lot of good lines.

Lowlights:

· None.

Grade: B+

[SKETCH] UPS Deliveryman

Highlights:

· Got funnier as it went along and the ending was great.

· The weekend scenes with the cleaning ladies.

· Seth as the Fed-Ex guy.

Lowlights:

· Started out too slow.

Grade: B

[SKETCH] Cece & Roger Barry

Highlights:

· The very brief egg jingle.

Lowlights:

· The rest of this was boring and I'm getting REALLY annoyed by Maya doing at least one singing sketch per show.  It seems to have become a weekly feature on the show lately.  Her singing sketches can SOMETIMES be funny ("The Best of T.T. & Mario"), but for the most part, they're awful.

Grade: D-

[FILM] Bear City

· Do I even need to waste time saying anything about these awful Bear City shorts anymore?

[MUSICAL PERFORMANCE]

[SKETCH/COMMERCIAL] Dirtball and Burnout Convention

Highlights:

· Spade's good at playing redneck character's like this.

· Skeeter! I always love Darrell's random appearances as this character. Did anyone notice he ad-libbed "Some other time" when he couldn't get the bottle top open in time?

· Some of the other redneck characters played by the other castmembers.

Lowlights:

· None.

Grade: B+

________________________________________

Overall Episode Grade: B-

Overall Highlights:

· David Spade's overall performance as the host. He was as funny as usual, he enhanced some weak and average sketches with his performances, and he helped give this episode a fun vibe that's been missing from most episodes this season.  This also proves that former castmembers need to host more often.

· Martha Addresses Employees

· Horatio as Vin Diesel and some of Spade's lines in the David Spade Stunt Double sketch

· Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast

· Dirtball and Burnout Convention

Overall Lowlights:

· The Deaf Judge commercial

· The ending of Spider's New Cellmate

· Weekend Update

· Cece & Roger Barry

· Bear City

Best Lines:

· Horatio Sanz as Vin Diesel: "I do all my stunts."

  David Spade: "Yeah, great. Who does your acting?"

· Horatio Sanz as Vin Diesel: "You know, in The Chronicles of Riddick, I fought fire monsters."

  David Spade: "Yeah, I know. We all read that in Who Cares magazine."

· Amy Poehler: "A Swedish company is marketing Nudie Jeans, a new brand of men's blue jeans that never require washing. Or as most guys call them: jeans."

· Tina Fey: "A North Dakota man who tried to walk 100 hours into Canada to see a girl he met over the internet had to have all of his fingers and half of his toes amputated because of frostbite. Even worse, when he got there, the chick was fat."

· Seth Meyers as Fed-Ex Deliveryman: (when the UPS guy enters) "Ha! UPS? No wonder I got here first."

CASTMEMBER COUNT DOWN:

ARMISEN: 3 sketches (Bizarre Neighbors Apartment / Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast / Dirtball and Burnout Convention)

DRATCH: 9 sketches (Martha Addresses Employees / Bizarre Neighbors Apartment / Deaf Judge & Idiot Doctor / David Spade Stunt Double / Woomba / Spider's new cellmate / Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast / UPS Deliveryman / Dirtball and Burnout Convention)

FEY: 5 sketches (Woomba / Weekend Update / Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast / UPS Deliveryman / Dirtball and Burnout Convention)

FORTE: 4 sketches (Deaf Judge & Idiot Doctor / Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast / Cece & Roger Barry / Dirtball and Burnout Convention)

HAMMOND: 2 sketches (Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast / Dirtball and Burnout Convention)

MEYERS: 5 sketches (Deaf Judge & Idiot Doctor / David Spade Stunt Double / Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast / UPS Deliveryman / Dirtball and Burnout Convention)

PARNELL: 4 sketches (Bizarre Neighbors Apartment / Deaf Judge & Idiot Doctor / Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast / Cece & Roger Barry)

POEHLER: 5 sketches (Martha Addresses Employees / David Spade Stunt Double / Woomba / Weekend Update / UPS Deliveryman)

RUDOLPH: 5 sketches (Martha Addresses Employees / Bizarre Neighbors Apartment / Woomba / UPS Deliveryman / Cece & Roger Barry)

SANZ: 3 sketches (David Spade Stunt Double / Weekend Update / Dirtball and Burnout Convention)

MITCHELL: 1 sketch (Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast)

RIGGLE: 4 sketches (Martha Addresses Employees / Spider's new cellmate / Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast / Dirtball and Burnout Convention)

THOMPSON: 2 sketches (Spider's new cellmate / Sean Penn's Celebrity Roast)

THE END

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